Is it easy to share your feelings, or do you bottle them up inside of you?
I know that I did …
As far back as I can remember through to my mid-fifties I was afraid to share my feelings. I bottled them up inside me thinking I was protecting myself and being strong.
Past betrayal, heartbreaks, and let downs convinced me that sharing my emotions and feelings would only bring me more pain,
But in fact, hiding them eventually left me feeling trapped, lonely, and depressed.
It was a vicious cycle …
The more I hid my feelings, the heavier they became.
Every “I'm fine” I uttered was a lie - a lie I kept repeating to everyone, including myself!
And in that lie, I lost myself!
When I attempted to open up to some friends, I was met with shame and dismissal, “Toughen up,” “You're too sensitive,” “You're strong, you'll get through it.”
So, I built higher walls.
I Felt that no one wanted to hear about my struggles and pain.
But what I really wanted was for them to see the real me, the messy me, the me that wasn't perfect, wasn't always strong. To be accepted just as I am.
Eventually, I came to a breaking point.
Pretending that I had it all together when I was falling apart inside was no longer an option. I had to find a way to let go of this fear, to learn to trust myself and others.
So, I began exploring my life and my own story.
I recognized how I was allowing painful past experiences to shut me down.
I came to understand that my emotions were real and valid.
Journaling was also a part of my healing process.
Writing helped me express emotions that I found difficult to say out loud.
It was like a mirror reflecting my thoughts and experiences, helping me to dig deep and understand my behavior. I further came to see that my emotions weren't flaws, but a part of me, of who I am.
As I healed I again mustered the courage to share my feelings and emotions. This time the response was mostly positive. Some appeared uncomfortable with this new me, but I now knew their reactions were a reflection of the own issues and not about me.
Through this messy journey, I discovered the healing power of vulnerability.
Sharing feelings and emotions is liberating - it's like a weight is lifted.
So here is my raw, unfiltered truth: I'm imperfect and that's okay. I cry when I'm hurt, I get angry and frustrated, and I feel joy that makes my heart dance.
I'm human, just like you. I've finally come to cherish this beautiful, messy, being that I am.
To be clear - being comfortable sharing your feelings doesn't mean you have to share everything with just anyone. You can be selective about who you want to share with.
But, continually bottling up everything inside is not healthy and over time can lead to a lot of emotional, mental, and physical issues, as happened to me.
This is my invitation for you to allow yourself to be fully SEEN. And if you are someone who bottles up your emotions, wears masks in order to fit in, or self-sacrifices to make everyone but yourself happy, I am here to talk.
Right now I have Exploration Calls open for my 1:1 coaching. If you would like to talk about what's possible for you, what that would look like, and how it would feel to be supported in this reply this email to schedule your complimentary session.
I am so looking forward to meeting you right where you are.
I help individuals mend the wounded parts of their relationship with themselves that keep them silently hiding in the shadows so that they are no longer held hostage by their own doubts and fears.
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